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| Bleech !!!!!! |
(Ninja's are my replacement for the n word, courtesy of VerySmartBrothas, tryna still keep it ladylike :))
So the other night against my knowledge I was lured out to the hood clubs on the far South Side. I was initially horrified when I learned we were going to The Factory, smh.
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| It's a strip club 90% of the time and they have no liquor license SMH |
(But as my bestie says I can't be bougie all of my life.)
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| Why can't I be bougie? Whitley was and she still found her Dwayne. |
Anywhoo by the time we arrived I was excited (or the alcohol had excited me) only to have my bubble burst because there was a fifty dollar cover, yeah we definitely weren't paying that. Our plan B was to head over to Adrianna's where my beloved Rick Ross was suppose to be making an appearance. However, upon our arrival we learned that they had a forty-five dollar cover. (We promptly made a U-TURN). Plan C, we headed to Mr. Ricky's (yes I know, but it was an experience I shan't soon forget).
Despite the fact that the club was extremely female heavy (and pretty empty because of a shooting a few weeks ago) and there was a plethora of women tryna win $500 from Mr. Ricky himself by disgracing themselves on the pole, my besties and I still managed to get Mr. Ricky himself to buy us drinks. I think its mostly because our wardrobe hadn't come out of Rainbow, nor did we have on purple lace wigs. After asking each of us our individual signs (SIDE EYE), he tried to convince us to get on the pole saying that we were bashful and that it was classy and would attract men. I rolled my eyes at him, and told him, "It is not classy and I have a father." Anywhoo, on the the toe sucking. (I shan't name any names). The besties and I were chillin at a booth, sipping on our drinks and feeling bad for the girl who literally fell off the pole when a quite drunken gentleman approached my very flyy and fabulous friend and asked if he might give her a foot massage, and did we want one also. Though the bestie and I declined, my fab friend obliged the man's wishes and he had her shoe off before he could even sit down good. The bestie and I sat together chatting and looking around, (You know doing the usual avert the eyes so not to cockblock) as my eyes shifted I suddenly realized that the man had my fab friends toes in his mouth and he was slipping off her other shoe to get to her other foot. The bestie and I realized with horror what we were witnessing. Coming to the realization that no sane ninjas were going to approach our booth with the freaky fool attached to my friends foot, the bestie and I jumped out of the booth and sat at the table directly behind it. The foot rubbing and toe sucking continued on for about fifteen more minutes, until we were given the signal to go and rescue my friend from the freaky fool. (During the toe sucking extravaganza a bouncer came past the booth and I guess he approved of what he saw because he didn't stop the fool). I'm writing about this hilarious adventure because it got me thinking that the thirst is real (as my cousin said). I'm not gonna say that men are the only ones out here thirsty and desperate, because well a woman astronaut drove across the country in a diaper for some man that didn't know she existed. However, if you really want to meet a woman or even get in her pants, whatever happen to dinner and a movie, or even just drinks? Toe sucking from the get-go it just a bit much LMAO. Anyway it was a epic end to a Chicago summer, back to NYC in a few. xoxoxoxoxoxo Chocolate Girl In the City xoxoxoxoxoxo P.S. Why isn't the entire series of A Different World on DVD? annoyed.