About four months natural |
Once again I have taken months off from updating :/ I'm quite sorry but it seems that my life can never normalize itself for a decent amount of time so I've spent the better part of the last two months just going through the motions.... Anywhoo, roughly a month ago now as I rocked back in forth under my desk (it was finals don't judge me). I realized that it was my one year anniversary of being natural. The best thing about remembering was that while life was busy spreading its butt hole all over me, my hair was the last thing on my mind
Let's do a quick review. For 21 years of my life, my hair was a raggedy whore, the bane of my existence. I explained this in my Big Chop Post. Last winter, I finally grew some lady balls and cut the ish off of my hair. For the first month or so I wore my hair out because I literally had no other choice, obviously I felt like an ugly boy and my self esteem was run into the grown in a way that it hadn't been since I was told being a "dark skin" female was an issue during my adolescence.
After about a month, I decided that I could not walk around looking hideous nor could I hide in my room until my hair grew back so I got a wig made and I pretty much wore that 5 out of 7 days a week. This lasted from about January until August when everything changed. In August I took my chocolate self to Jamaica and had both a blast and a revelation.
My beateous wig. Clearly I thought that I was everything |
First off there was no way I was about to lay in 85 degree weather on a glorious beach with a hot ass wig on my head. I contemplated getting braids but the horror of someone pulling my hair deterred me. Also, I wanted to buy vacation clothes more than I wanted to spend money on getting braids. Instead, I gathered my courage and my passport and took my ass on my first adult vaca with my lovely friend.
Let's just say that Jamaica was glorious, the sun, the food, the men, the drinks, the water, the men, the beach, the men LOL. I say this without an ounce of arrogance (well perhaps a little because I don't normally gloat) but I've never gotten so much attention from the male species in my Black ass life. I get the average amount of play normally but good lord. Men were stopping to say hello everywhere we went. Dudes would stop while I was stretched on my beach chair, one of the waiters clearly wanted me to get my grove back because he stalked me the two nights we dined at the Italian restaurant at the resort and then proceeded to tell me he would follow me back to NYC. There was also the group of Black Englishmen (Idris accents on Black men yesss GAWWDDD) who accosted me in the elevator grinning at me and telling me that my hair was "radical" and that they enjoyed it immensely. Pretty much from that moment on my wig and I have broken up, save Halloween and the occasional quick errand to Trader Joes or Duane Reade.
Jamaica in August wigless and free |
I know some people may think that it took attention from men to change me opinion about my hair, and I guess you can say that but, what's interesting to me is that I attract a different type of man. The type of man that seems to be genuinely interested in me and not just how that I can have the illusion of long hair. Don't get me wrong though I still envy a sickening weave and I'll probably have a couple more myself this lifetime.
I've ever felt so free in my life, I literally wash my hair once a week, twist it up, go to bed and untwist it the next day. For the remainder of the week I do NOTHING. I just wrap it in a scarf and go to bed. I've gotten it straighten and cut once and that was that. I can do my three miles at the gym jump in the shower and then go out. Its quite liberating albeit a bit boring to see the same hair day after day.
The longest my hair got 9 months natural |
10 months natural post cut. She took about 4 inches off straightened and curled |
With all of this being said, being natural isn't for everyone and it certainly takes some getting use to, but for me, I've never felt more like myself.
The other day :) |